Journals: 2001
(A Sparse Odyssey)

by Ric Carter

Journal Entries: A Very Mixed Year

13 January 2001, Forestville California

"The secret," Julie Stein said, "The secret to writing popular music is to have a song that is melodically simple and harmonically attractive." Notice that he didn't say that it should be harmonically complex, or simple, or even harmonically interesting -- just harmonically attractive. Hmmm...

Bumper stickers, er uh, plate frames actually: ALWAYS LATE BUT WORTH THE WAIT, and SPOILED TO PERFECTION.

"There's faces in my memory, there's faces in my future, there's faces in my nightmares I'm twitchin' and I'm squirmin', like some terrestrial vermin, I might as well be German"


See AS GOOD AS IT COULD POSSIBLY GET: Optimizing Your Existence, dictated on 13 February 2001.

See Hellography: New Geographies of Hell, developed from notes dictated on 14 February 2001.

See If Political Correctness Is A Game Then Here Are The Rules, dictated on 21 February 2001


4 March 2001 -- a hard-rain day, Forestville CA

Games that can be played in big cities.
  • Street Gold, or Sewer Gold: Take turns flipping-open manhole covers. If you find anything valuable inside, you win.
  • Block Dodge: Choose a city block. Run from one corner to another. If you make it without being intercepted by gangs, police or reporters, you win.
  • Freeway Dodge: Drive down a major highway. Change lanes quickly in front of another vehicle. If they don't shoot, you win.
  • Vendor Dodge: Walk in an area filled with aggressive street vendors. If any of them get their hands in your pockets, they win.
  • Sidewalk Lotto: Walk past a group of homeless people. If any of them persuade you to give them money, they win.

[from my email]
----- Original Message -----
From: "Al Christians" [achrist@easystreet.com]
Date: 4 March, 2001

> > On March 3, 1931, ``The Star-Spangled Banner'' officially
> > became the national anthem of the United States.
>
> There was no official US National Anthem before that.

Which leads to anthems in general. They seem to be of European origin. Non-euro states didn't bother with anthems until after they'd been colonized/subjugated by the West. Now every nation and state has an anthem, mostly dreadful, something to keep the brass bands busy at receptions and official athletic events.

Here in the U.S., the nation has an anthem; states have official songs (I could hum I LOVE YOU CALIFORNIA but don't expect any of the words out of me); some cities have more-or-less recognized tunes (eg NEW YORK, NEW YORK or I'M PROUD TO BE A DAGO FROM SAN DIEGO); high schools have their 'alma maters', some orchestral/ band piece with cruddy lyrics attached (I sang HAIL POMONA HAIL to the tune of FINLANDIA, but only under duress); ad infinitum.

Corporate anthems seem to be big in Japan. Will the spread of global corporations result in redefining citizenship, from birth/ residence in a physical state, to employment by a corporate state, with anthems, flags, uniforms, rituals etc to instill spirit??

But let's go the other way, expanding beyond circumscribed pride. Continental, hemispheric anthems. Racial anthems. Species/genus/ order anthems. Planetary anthems. Solar-system anthems. Galactic anthems. Dimensional anthems. (Meta-)Universal anthems. Anthems for every reality/probability, subspace, timetrack, whatever. And don't molecules, atoms, particles, quarks all deserve anthems too?

Hey, this sounds like a good songwriting/composition project.

It won't be simple: writing a corporate anthem with a catchy tune that has a rhyme for 'AOL-TimeWarner' will be a bitch-kitty, as will writing a racial anthem for White Aryan Pinheads; but some planetary anthems will be easy, like UP URANUS! or ZETA RETICULI WANTS YOU! And of course the wee methanol molecule has already inspired many anthems, including the tune of STAR-SPANGLED BANNER.

Am I the only songwriter here? How about some contributions, folks?

*** SkeptiChat 1.00.06.27 *** http://www.sonic.net/~ric/vsub.htm

> It won't be simple: writing a corporate anthem with a catchy tune
> that has a rhyme for 'AOL-TimeWarner' will be a bitch-kitty...

Upon further consideration, I don't think it'll be so hard after all. Sure, infusing the piece with spirit will be tricky, but the structure is easy: a trip-hop beat under the words 'A-O-L Time- Warner' repeated endlessly, with noise effects layered on top. It could be played by any marching band with trained drummers and a few seagulls to be tortured -- it's their agonized squawks that'll add just the right top-notes, eh? Evocative of customers receiving increased monthly bills...

*** SkeptiChat 1.00.06.27 *** http://www.sonic.net/~ric/vsub.htm

So there's the theme of the next song-cycle: anthems, some with familiar tunes, some with originals, all meant to inspire whatever.

Journal Entries: Spring Briefs

7 March 2001 -- online confession

I was once a werewolf at Los Angeles Int'l, but that was a long time ago. I avoid punching out Hare Krishnas. I try to stay away from airports now. It doesn't always work.

March-April: Amalfi-Pompeii, Italy -- click here

It was a most splendid journey, I can't wait to go back, we can afford to stay around Southern Europe because it costs the same as staying 'home', stay tuned for further developments.

Friday the 18th of May, year 2001

President-designate George W. Bush, speaking about retaliations in Palestine and Israel, between the Palestinians and Israelis, killings and more killings, said "Violence does not lead to peace." I should put that quote up underneath all pictures of police brutality, troops shooting at folks, etc etc. Oh yeah, and under pictures of executions.

Meanwhile: Build a stone megalith circle in the meadow at the new place... Look for: STONE CIRCLES - A Modern Builder's Guide To The Megalithic Revival, Rob Roy, published by Chelsea Green Publishing.

Afterthought: Sometime late spring 2001

Sonoma County was a fine place to live (except for allergens) while working but too expensive for post-employment. We'd been looking all over the western US for a 'retirement' homesite; the best deal was a little 1.3 acre plot just 2 miles from Maureen's mother's house. The price was a steal, the cost of the installed infrastructure. We bought; thus selling the Forestville house became necessary. Gargantuan efforts ensued. Sheesh.

Journal Entries: Autumn Briefs

16 Aug 2001, Forestville California

A day elsewhere may be an excursion, an expedition, at least an adventure. A day at home is usually just a day at home. The usual happens. The routines occur routinely. If it's quiet, there's time for reading, writing, surfing, reflecting, producing, inducing. if unquiet, there's just disruption, labor, bother. It's difficult to generalize the usual -- much better to swing thru uncertain climes and record them.

So leave it all behind. Live in a different country, a different world, the future. Or the past. Or the present. Or whatever. Live somewhere else. Record the events there. Don't bother with inventing history, for reality is so much more unreal.

I had a cigar. It was good.
I had a whiskey. It was good. Or not.
I missed recent opportunities for other stuff. Too bad.

17 Aug 2001.

The sky is a devouring maw, closed in daytime, open at night showing its starry teeth, swallowing or regurgitating in the twilights. We are sucked up by the universe and spat out again like small frogs at a county fair. The ticket-takers don't even blink.

Is it just me, or what? When I'm drunk, in my bedroom, I roll over and look at the ceiling. The rest of the time I care nothing about the ceiling. Wasted enough, and I'm looking up. There it is, lousy light fixture in the middle. Sometimes, if I haven't used a broom or vacuum lately, there's spiderwebs, cobwebs, casting shadows across the sagging ceiling. So I have another drink or three and don't worry 'bout that anymore. Til next time.

18 Aug 2001

The search for beauty, for stability, for utility, is tiring. Very tiring. The search consumes many miles. The miles consume many hours. The hours devour life, love, strength. I want a hamburger.

Walk thru many trailers, searching for the ideal residential machine. Tour the factory, see how they're made. Watch the others to learn why. Talk to many hawkers, of greaer or lesser proficiency, knowledge, humanity, sanity. Why are they all like this?

19 Aug 2001

Plans are made, plans fall apart. Promises are made & broken. Substitutions fade in and out. Eventually something happens, a simulation of the intention. Alternate plans are made. None of these plans are necessarily executed.

My room becomes barer, dominated by the Escher print suite and a large wooden lizard. Those should dominate the next room too. And fewer books. Or maybe just instruments, music literature and equipment, a composition venue overlooked by modernism.

20 Aug 2001

Some days, nothing happens. Some days, everything does. What day is this? How can I tell? If something happens and I don't notice it, has it really happened? If I think something happened but I'm hallucinating, is the perception as valid as the illusion?

Maybe sometimes it's better if nothing happens. Many things happen, or seem to happen, that I would prefer hadn't. Experiencing such happenings can be very tiring. Awaiting happenings that don't eventuate is also tiring. Everything is tiring. I am so tired.


1 Sept 2001

This attempt to sell the house could turn into a long siege. Meanwhile, my reference archives are packed away, new electronic tools aren't fully functional, communications are scattered, deadlines are pending but ultimately irrelevant, and few songs come to mind. Neither murder nor exercise are committed. Yet. Just restraint. Lots of restraint. And I need more ropes.

[2-5 Sept 2001]

Keep plugging away. Whatever.

6-7 Sept 2001

Many miles. Many trials. No vials. Bother. Forestville - Sacramento - Auburn - Volcano & back -- checking out the modular house dealers, still not committed. Somebody is going to be very disappointed. Fock'em. Most of these dealers are scum, thieves, psychos, and/or dolts. Even the best of'em are just marginally competent. Such a problem. Why does the industry attract such marginal characters? Why can't they go back to selling used cars, or telemarketing, or televangelism?

8-9 Sept 2001

Something happened, but I don't remember what. Something around Forestville & Santa Rosa & Sebastopol & maybe Bodega Bay. Something other than just sunrise, noontide, sunset, etc. But hunched over the keyboard, or making familiar rounds, it's hard to keep track of external events. They seem to flow by in a colorless blur, like a noisy TV screen..

Mon 10 Sept 2001 - St. Nicola da T.

Trying to put the finishing touches on the 50Megs archives. Finished with the Xians subset of the liturature, programmed a framework for the rest. Buddhists, Hindus, Pagans, etc. So many faiths, so many sacred texts, so little consistency. Explore the modularity of these texts, work on mechanisms for morphing them, interbreeding them, synthesizing them, evolving them. Make them healthier, eh?

Tues 11 Sept 2001 - S. Gervasio

Continuing as yesterday. Midmorning, Mom calls: "Barbi and Bill and Gus are OK!" I ask, "Why shouldn't they be?" She sez, "Didn't you watch TV?" and that's when I learnt about the WTC & Pentagon attacks. The rest of the day is spent online & tubed & benumbed.

Later, it seems that this day is a turning point, a transition from dream to nightmare, from ordinary life to fear & loathing. At the time it was just a numbness. That is all.

Wed 12 Sept 2001 - S. Guido

Today I'm supposed to be prepping the RV for vacation but somehow that isn't happening. More online & TV, more diddling with archives, more tending to petty shit. A war just started? To what effect?

Thurs 13 Sept 2001 - S. Giovanni C.

Still very little in the way of vacation readiness. Are we going, or too sick, or what? Everything seems indeterminate. Bother.

Post 9-11 'Vacation' Or Whatever

Fri 14 Sept 2001 - Esalt. S. Croce

Very late, we leave. Drive hard & fast, but traffic is light. Fueled & foolish we leave the state, arrive at the stink of Mom's, the drink of Harry's.

Sat 15 Sept 2001 - B.V.Addolor.

A day to remember, a day to forget. Morning a blur. Over to the 'formal' birthday-anniversary celebration, gnosh a bit, then escape the assembled old farts with a spin around the valley. Then back to Harry's, with no dinner, with Jeanne wailing, with Nathan spinning, with various kinfolk drifting in & out of reality, with way too much drink. The truth of Grandpa revealed: drugs & booze & sex. Grandma as a motorcycle babe in WWI. More than I ever wanted to know about my ancestry. Music. Madness. Motion.

Sun 16 Sept 2001 - 24th Tempo Or.

Much better today - Jeanne gone. Wake late, roll over to mammoth brunch & group photos, then escape for a spin thru & over the Applegate. Back for more (but less) drink & food. Somehow the day is survived.

Mon 17 Sept 2001 - S. Roberto B.

Pack up, accept many veggies & herbs, head out, visit, follow advise on next campground - but Indian Mary's is too sedate (we're too young for it) so we end up in the wrong hills.

Tues 18 Sept 2001 - S. Costanzo

Across the valley again, out to the coast -- stalled by CalTrans for hours, we actually reach & ascend the Chetco. War talk is around, and flags, but few other indications. How can we tell when the war is over?

Wed 19 Sept 2001 - S. Gennaro

Sitting by the river. Sitting in the river. Looking at the river. Plop. Beyond Upper Chetco: South Fork Chetco River, Upper South Fork campsite. Been a long time.

Plans for return: new fast small laptop.* Dub CDs to MD-LP. Network the laptops, connect the camcorder & CD burner, do the imagery. Maybe start digitizing 78s. Explore the bounds of the Wireless Web. Get more free Web accounts, upload archives. Research homebuilding. Stop drinking. Soon.

20-21 Sept 2001 - S. Andrea K., S. Matteo

Upper Chetco, OR. Plop. Walk. Plop. Splash. Plop. Snooze.

Sat 22 Sept 2001 - S. Maurizio

Scan the Chetco River Inn, the North Country Fair, & bookstore in Arcata. See the bin Laden WANTED poster in Trinidad. Traverse the Giants & the Coast Range; bed down in Westport.

Sun 23 Sept 2001 - 25th Tempo Or.

More books in Ft. Bragg, lunch in Mendo, then home again, home again.

Dragging Onwards

24-28 Sept - Forestville

The usual grind, plus electronics and house-hopes and dog-decay and war. Focking war. Or non-war, at least not constitutional. Focking warhounds, chickenhawks, opportunistic militaristic assholes.

These are very depressing times. Jake is dying, freedom is dying, hope is dying. The sun is bright but punishing. The nights are clear but threatening. Things suck.

Tue 25 Sept 2001 - S. Aurelia V. - Forestville

Time and space should run backwards a little
The fallen buildings should raise themselves again
The fallen jets should bounce back into the sky
Breath and life should flow back into people
Bullets should crawl back into their barrels
Lies should jump back into their windpipes
Hatreds should coil back into their cauldrons
Time and space should run backwards a little

The world seems strangely the same, despite all predictions of imminent change. Maybe it's because of the distance between NYC and DC (symbols of US power) from the rest of the citizenry. Maybe it's just a Zen koan. Maybe it's the hardware. Or anything else -- ?Quien sabe?

No reaction is appropriate
No reaction stands the winds of time
We're all just focking idiots
I'll be yours if you'l be mine

Thur 11 Oct 2001 - S. Firmina V. - Forestville

No winds of time blow fear away
No leaves fall without effect
No reaction goes unseen
I'll be your favorite large insect

I find it difficult to journalize the now, the last few weeks, any instant or collection of instants. Too many threads of changes -- personal, local, regional,global. One thread: the last days of Jake, who we euthenized 9 days ago. Another thread: preparation for selling the Forestville house, and the offers and counters and acceptance, signed 2 days ago. Another thread: the terror that started one month ago, and the fears and conspiracies that ensued. Another thread: the search for the next house, to be built around Volcano. Another thread: too much alcohol. And the downloaded images, broadcast images, sound images.

Fri 12 Oct 2001 - S. Serafino - Forestville

Noticed incidents: Overhead, many helicopters; and passenger jets accompanied by fighters. Shoppers seem subdued, wary. Email volume is vast, but very few UFO / paranormal reports. I finally lied when I said, "I always come back for Jake." Realtors are pirhanas. I must limit myself to handtrucking 9-10 cu.ft. of books downstairs daily, or strain my ankles. Tinnitus never diminishes. Electronic toys don't really fill the holes, but they help. Constant housecleaning sucks.

What else has happened: many drives to meet with house dealers or their minions, in valley and mountains. Many preparations for Open House presentations, some of which occurred. Many boxes packed. Many items scuttled. Many emails deleted. Much time wasted.

Mon 22 Oct 2001 - S. Ermas - Forestville

Still nothing final on the house. In the outside world: more attacks in Afghanistan, more anthrax scares, more fear -- somewhere. Tyranny, corruption, death: "I knew this would happen some day!"

But it's clear that thinking about politics, about conspiracies, isn't helping me think about other things -- no songs, no images, no assemblages, just paranoia. Can I do political / conspiratorial art?

Two Months And Onwards

Thursday 8 November 2001, Forestville CA

Have researched the Hans Bol prints a bit -- drawings are VERY valuable, prints may be of some worth, they should be appraised. We inventoried the Indian pottery & they're valuable (bought a bunch more last weekend). Jewelry next. I'm becoming increasingly testy on CTRL, may quit soon. The house sale looks like it may actually happen. I may have to burst into activity soon.

Album: ANOTHER SIDE OF OSAMA BIN DYLAN (do album cover) - see the project notes here

Web pages [to work on]: What Would * Do? -- Anthrax letters -- Unabomber letters -- Flags & patterns -- flags & words -- more thumbstables -- ORC: ID image -- post the HO stuff -- find Hambly covers -- shoot my screens -- reactivate my Pitas blogs -- etc

Saturday 10 November 2001, Forestville CA

I walk into the bathroom, and I cry
I walk back to the bedroom, and I cry
I walk into the kitchen, and I cry
I listen to the radio, and I cry
Then something comes up, and I laugh
Then something comes up, and I cry
Again

Monday 19 November 2001, Forestville CA

We live at the intersection of the sacred & the profane, drifting in-between. It's a busy corner, traffic whizzing past, and we wonder when it's safe to cross. Or maybe that's a 5-points, a junction of sanctity & profanity & reality & irrelevance & unknowableness, all these roads surrounding a small pentagonal traffic island. Noisy place, eh?

Someday 1 December 2001, Forestville CA

It's getting harder & harder to write. The elists are nearly worthless except to deliver disheartening news. The songs won't come. I busy myself tweaking the websites, font-fiddling, forcing errors from helpless machines. The house sale may go thru soon, or may not. Everybody's gotten notice. We may frenzy soon.

This has been a bad year for guitarists: John Fahey, Chet Atkins, Fred Neil, John Lee Hooker, now George Harrison, probably others I don't remember now. See DEATHWATCH for all the latest, such as: Grady Martin, Isaac Stern (fiddle not gitfiddle), Mimi Farina, John Hartford, Joey Ramone, John Phillips, Luis Bonfa. Ah, Lightnin' Hopkins? [No.] These were the guys whose fretwork I admired, tried to learn from, tried to sound like, and POOF they're gone. Bother.

Tuesday 18 December 2001, Santa Rosa CA

Now we're maybe 98% moved (1st move). Some stuff in the yard yet to get (after the holidays), the canoe & ladder, then it's over. This part. None of the details of this process are worth recording, since they inescapably associate with pain, weariness, confusion, stress. Be glad it's over (almost).

So now, in the perfect American roadside diner, Santa Rosa style: Carlos' Country Kitchen -- formerly Azar's -- transitioned from Armenian to Mexican but essentially the same fried breakfast and lunch specials, sustenance for local workers. Tall thin sassy waitress taunting the staff in high-school Spanish, taunting the customers in down-home English. Mirrored walls to enlarge the space, fans & tiffany lamps hanging high, windows painted with Xmas scenes, giggling gaggles of girls emerging onto the cold morning, all parking spaces filled.

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