Title: What if Microsoft was in Alabama?

 The ways things would be different if Microsoft was headquartered in
 Alabama:

 1. Their #1 product would be Microsoft Winders

 2. Instead of an hourglass icon you'd get an empty beer bottle

 3. Occasionally you'd bring up a winder that was covered with a Hefty bag

 4. Dialog boxes would give you the choice of "Ahh-right" or "Naw"

 5. Instead of "Ta-Da!", the opening sound would be Dueling Banjos

 6. The "Recycle Bin" in Winders '95 would be an outhouse

 7. Whenever you pulled up the Sound Player you'd hear a digitized drunk
 redneck yelling "Freebird!"

 8. Instead of "Start Me Up", the Winders '95 theme song wouid be
 Achy-Breaky Heart

 9. PowerPoint would be named "ParPawnt"

 10. Microsoft's programming tools would be "Vishul Basic" and "Vishul C++"

 11. Winders '95 logo would incorporate the Confederate Flag

 12. Microsoft Word would be just that: one word

 13. New Shutdown WAV: "Y'all come back now!"

 14. Instead of VIP, Microsoft big shots would be called "Cuz"

 15. Hardware could be repaired using parts from an old Trans Am

 16. Microsoft Office replaced with Micr'sawft Henhouse

 17. Four words: Daisy Duke's Screen Saver

 18. Well, the first thing you know, old Bill's a billionaire

 19. Speadsheet software would include examples to inventory dead cars in
 your front yard

 20. Flight Simulator replaced by Tractor-Pull Simulator

 22. Microsoft CEO: Bubba Gates



To most people solutions mean finding the
answers.  But to chemists solutions are things
that are still all mixed up.

From: Ray