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I watched you breathe in the steam from your mug
slowly bringing the wet into your lungs
you have tainted your water with tea
I have tainted my life with your looks.
Last night Venus swam in our veins
she made us laugh the heat off
giggling as we spilled vodka in our laps.
We bled ourselves through thirsty kisses
our spirits fizzing together in time
unmoved.
In the morning i sneezed Venus out
she fell into my cereal.

Mary Amellin's questions:

1. What do you think of this poem?

2. I have tried many times to expand on it but i always seem to lose track of it meaning/feeling. Do you have any advice for that?

3. Do you think it is alright as is?

4. is it too vague?

Thank you