Bird Songs
These are songs I wrote during a prolific but meaningless period in the 1970's. As such, some of the lyrics are dated (who'd have thought
I'd procrastinate beyond the fall of communism) but they're kind of fun anyway...
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I used to be a radical...it's tragical
A follower of Chairman Mao
And I used to think that the revolution
Would save the world somehow
But a friend of mine straightened me out
When he came by the other day
Sold me on America
And this is what he had to say...
Well there ain't no Porsches in Peking
No discos in Hanoi
Muscovites got nothin' to do
But sit around and read Tolstoy
The nights in old Havana
Are no longer filled with joy
And there ain't no Porsches in Peking
Or discos in Hanoi
I took a look around and found
That what he'd said was true
Capitalism wasn't so bad
From a different point of view
The proletariat are heroes
But their life's not very plush
And the bourgeoisie is rotten
But cocaine is a rush
Well there ain't no Porsches in Peking
No discos in Hanoi
Muscovites got nothin' to do
But sit around and read Tolstoy
The nights in old Havana
Are no longer filled with joy
And there ain't no Porsches in Peking
Or discos in Hanoi
The poor are just like women
Or if you're a woman...men
Just fuck 'em and forget 'em
And fuck 'em all again
Money is what money gets
And money's your only friend
Yeah number one's the only one
You got to cop to in the end
Well there ain't no Porsches in Peking
No discos in Hanoi
Muscovites got nothin' to do
But sit around and read Tolstoy
The nights in old Havana
Are no longer filled with joy
And there ain't no Porsches in Peking
Or hot tubs in Hanoi
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Well I don't drive a Lincoln
And I don't drive a Coupe de Ville
I drive a Buick with a big back seat
That I just love to fill
And I don't own a beach house
Out on Malibu Drive
I've got a trailer in a mobile home court
Out on Highway Twenty-five
I'm a low-cal sugar daddy
Just as low as I can be
Spend my life lookin' for a woman
Who wants her daddy sugar-free
Now all the folks down in Hollywood
All go down to the disco
But I hang out at the Cheyenne Club
Where drinks are a buck a throw
So if you're looking for me
Anywhere in this big world
Just ask about the okie
Who left with all the girls
I'm a low-cal sugar daddy
Just as low as I can be
Spend my life lookin' for a woman
Who wants her daddy sugar-free
I'm a low-cal sugar daddy and the girls don't mind
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Well life is hard down on the farm
And I wish that you were here
I miss those long cold winter nights
When I used to hold you near
But I miss your cooking most of all
I'd like to make that clear
I'm so tired of coming home to
Cold beans and beer
Cold beans and beer
Shortly after supper
My friends all disappear
Don't know how much longer
I can persevere
A man just can't go on living on cold beans and beer
I read your letters from LA
About your modeling career
And for every word I read
I shed a silent tear
You might as well be living in
A different hemisphere
One where they ain't never heard of
Cold beans and beer
Cold beans and beer
Shortly after supper
My friends all disappear
Don't know how much longer
I can persevere
A man just can't go on living on cold beans and beer
Yes I miss those ham and eggs
I used to hold so dear
And I miss your pork chops
That I used to revere
And I miss that buttered corn
I'd gobble every ear
I miss everything except
Cold beans and beer
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PRISONER OF ANOTHER MAN'S MIND
This song's all about a man that I met
And he lived pretty close to you
He's spent his whole life looking for answers
To questions that he never knew
Never thought for himself just followed along
A believer without a clue
He'd swallow up lies as if they were gumdrops
And vomit them all over you
He's a prisoner of another mind
His own he has left far behind
He's just like a toy you would pick up and wind
He's a prisoner of another man's mind
If you ask him about the meaning of life
He'll quote you some lines from a book
But he really don't know 'cause his eyes are shut tight
'Cause it scares him too much to look
Then along come some guy with a hat full of answers
And he'll swallow them bait line and hook
'Til he's following blindly not wanting to know
If this guy's a fool or a crook
He's a prisoner of another mind
His own he has left far behind
He's just like a toy you would pick up and wind
He's a prisoner of another man's mind
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I ain't goin' door to door no more
I ain't goin' door to door no more
I ain't goin' door to door
Tongue gets tired 'n feet get sore
I ain't goin' door to door no more
I ain't goin' pump no gas no more
I ain't goin' pump no gas no more
I ain't goin' pump no gas
Stand outside 'n freeze my ass
I ain't goin' pump no gas no more
I ain't goin' wash no plates no more
I ain't goin' wash no plates no more
I ain't goin' wash no plates
That's one job I truly hates
I ain't goin' wash no plates no more
I ain't goin' pound no nail no more
I ain't goin' pound no nail no more
I ain't goin' pound no nail
Don't care if I land in jail
I ain't goin' pound no nail no more
I ain't goin' fry no hash no more
I ain't goin' fry no hash no more
I ain't goin' fry no hash
Ain't no way it's worth the cash
I ain't goin' fry no hash no more
I ain't goin' wash no cars no more
I ain't goin' wash no cars no more
I ain't goin' wash no car
Goin' cut a record 'n be a star
I ain't goin' wash no car no more
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I was born in a dirt town
The son of a slave
To a system that he couldn't beat
Yeah he'd work all day to pay last month's bills
Come home tired and dead on his feet
But he told me son
Get out of this town
Don't let them put no shackles on you
'Cause they break you and bleed you
To your last dying breath
And throw you on the heap when they're through
But they ain't gonna get me
Lord they ain't gonna get me no
Non they ain't gonna get me
I've seen 'em do it too many times
My dad worked for one man
Some thirty odd years
Just so he could retire
The big boss told him
There was gold at the end
But the big boss he was a liar
My dad kept the bosses
Eating steak and champagne
And came home to burgers and gin
It just goes to show
When you work for a wage
There ain't no way that you'll win
But they ain't gonna get me
Lord they ain't gonna get me no
Non they ain't gonna get me
I've seen 'em do it too many times
I'm packing my bags
Gonna leave this town
Before I end up on my knees
In dirt I was born
And in dirt I'll rest
But the dirt in this town's a disease
It gets into your blood
And it drags you down
'Til it chains you to the machines
That grind you under
And spit you out
And they replace you with a kid in his teens
But they ain't gonna get me
Lord they ain't gonna get me no
Non they ain't gonna get me
I've seen 'em do it too many times
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You say you don't want to be my lover
You say you'll only be my friend
Well let me set you straight on that one darlin'
This sensitive crap's about to end
So wrap yourself around my dingwah darlin'
Wrap yourself around my old wazoo
I'm feelin' blue
And it's all because of you
So wrap yourself around my dingwah do
I don't know how this ever started
I don't know how it got this far
But it's got to the point where you're cramping my style
So get in the back seat or get out of my car
So wrap yourself around my dingwah darlin'
Wrap yourself around my old wazoo
I'm feelin' blue
And it's all because of you
So wrap yourself around my dingwah do
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Nice guys are good to know
Nice guys never run the show
Nice guys go where you want to go
And they will pay for everything
And then they'll drive you home
Nice guys are so polite
Nice guys always treat you right
Nice guys would rather lose than fight
And you can make them feel like hell
And they'll come back for more
Nice guys have money to spend
Nice guys have cars to lend
Nice guys will always be your friend
And do just what you tell them
And never ask for nothing
Nice guys go for midnight walks
Nice guys listen when you talk
Nice guys all have four inch cocks
At least that's what they tell me
I've never really seen one
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Sittin' here and singin' the blues
Walked a mile with holes in my shoes
Seems like I was born to lose
Every day brings more bad news
Sittin' here with a frown on my face
Can't seem to get to first base
The boss ain't hiring my race
All my taxes get shot into space
Sittin' here and feelin' low
Can't take another blow
My watch is runnin' slow
My wife ran off with all my dough
Sittin' here with a tear in my eye
My connections have all run dry
Makes me stop and wonder why
Seems silly to even try
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I went to get a job they said listen jerk
You got to have a card if you want to work
I went down to the hall they said look here slob
If you want a card you got to have a job
I got the union blues
Way down in my shoes
You know I got to lose
'Cause I don't pay no dues
I got the union blues
I tried to catch a bus the man said take a hike
Nobody's riding 'cause I'm goin' on strike
Stood in the rain didn't know what to do
Tried to call a cab but they were on strike too
I got the union blues
Way down in my shoes
You know I got to lose
'Cause I don't pay no dues
I got the union blues
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