Social(ist) Security

By Robert L. Rush

The one issue on which there is universal, bi-partisan agreement is that the greatest challenge looming at the dawn of this millennium is the dilemma of Social Security, the largest and one of the last entitlement programs left from the commie-inspired New Deal and it's illegitimate offspring, The Great Society. The problem is obvious. The math in this case is definitively non-fuzzy. In the next few years the first of the "baby boomer's" will begin to retire. Meanwhile, many of their parents, which the system had calculated to be dead by now are still with us. This places an enormous demand on the system. At the same time the supply of workers paying into the system is decreasing, in large part due to the rise of the feminist movement in the 1970's with their pro-abortion/birth control agenda. These facts have been known for years. Previous attempts to fix the system have only managed to keep it on life-support. Meanwhile disaster looms ahead like an iceberg in the path of this bureaucratic Titanic. I hear your question, America. You want to know why, if we've known about this problem for so long, a real solution wasn't arrived at years ago. The blame, as usual, rest with the liberals.

WAKE UP AMERICA! In the years since it's inception, it has become a sacred cow of the big government free spending liberals, which they have used as a club to implement their secret agenda of redistributing wealth upon an unsuspecting public. Anyone who has opposed their plan has been bludgeoned with attack ads designed to frighten seniors into electing more liberals and thus perpetuating this demonic cycle. It's time for the rhetoric to end. The fate of our Republic hangs in the balance. Social security has become a bureaucratic black hole which threatens to suck up not only the budget surplus, but every other ill-gotten tax dollar it can lay it's hands on.

Gore and the liberals propose to solve the problem the way they always do with failing government programs…throw more money at it. George W. Bush has proposed freeing up 6% of the money for investment by individual taxpayers. While he's certainly on the right track, I fear that my good friend George has taken the "local" on this one, whereas myself and many other pre-eminent conservative scholars are on the "express". With all due respect, 6% is a band-aid where a tourniquet is required. The traditional conservative approach to a failing government program is to a) end it or b) turn it over to the private sector. I propose we do both.

The social security bureaucracy should be dismantled and the trust fund returned to the taxpayers. We should refund the money they paid in (minus disbursements) and tell them, "Here's your money, there's Wall Street, give it your best shot". Imagine the boost that such an influx of capital would be for the markets. Why, the commissions alone would be staggering.

"What happens next?" you ask. Natural selection, that's what. There would be winners and losers. That's what a free market system is all about. No more of this commie-rot doctrine of expecting the government to take care of everyone. Of course, I hear the sniveling liberals in the background whining about depriving seniors of their "rightful entitlement" and robbing them of their dignity. And what about senior who have already drawn more money than they put into the system? I can already hear the sob stories about old people scavenging cans by the side of the road to make ends meet. My response is that it is the liberals who are denying these folks their dignity…dooming them to a life of bingo and shuffleboard. Most seniors I know vibrant, lucid, able-bodied survivors. I say it's time we gave them their dignity back…just as we gave the welfare culture back their dignity. In other words, "Go get a job, slackers!" In a time of acute labor shortage, when every fast food joint in town has a "help wanted" sign hanging, to exclude our most experienced workers from the work force is unconscionable. As for those unfortunate souls society refers to as "shut ins" I would point to the phenomenal growth of the telemarketing industry.

While we're slaying sacred cows, I think we should abolish Medi-care. I mean, if all their going to do is sit around and complain about their operations, let's give them fewer to complain about. Come to think of it, abolishing Medi-care would go a long way toward lessening the glut of seniors in the system. Sometimes I astound myself.

Because it's Right

Because it's the Truth

Because I said so!

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