Dan Quayle

"In His Own Words"

RLR: Today we're speaking with former Vice-President Dan Quayle. Let's get right to the issue. A lot of your critics in the liberal media have made fun of statements you have made…as well as your now infamous spelling error…in order to detract from your record of public service. How do you respond to that?

DQ: Bob, I want to thank you for an opportunity to set the record staight. Public speaking is very easy, but I stand by all the misstatements that I've made. I mean, the American people would not want to know of any misquotes Dan Quayle may or may not have made.

RLR: As if mangling a verb or two is the true measure of intellect.

DQ: Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.

RLR: So you feel that you have been unfairly portrayed?

DQ: We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made. I have made good judgements in the past. I have made good judgements in the future.

RLR: Speaking of the future, could you share with us your vision for the future?

DQ: The future will be better tommorrow. We don't want to go back to tommorrow, we want to go forward. I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward freedom and democracy - but that could change. If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.

RLR: I know we agree that the key to success in the future is a Republican administration. And of course the key to a successful administration is to attract high-caliber individuals to serve in key positions.

DQ: Absolutely, Bob. People that are really weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history.

RLR: The talk around town is that you are in line for a high ranking position within the administration. I would think your experience as a former vice-president would be invaluable to any administration.

DQ: One word sums up probably the resonsiblity of the vice-president, and that one word is "to be prepared". That's the goal. So that we are ready for any unforseen event that may or may not occur.

DQ: Yes, I couldn't agree more. The global importance of the Middle East is that it keeps the Far East and the Near East from encroaching on each other.

RLR: Not to mention our historic commitment to Israel, which goes back to the Holocaust.

DQ: The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.

RLR: This is also the situation in the Balkans, which has many Americans questioning our involvement in Europe and NATO.

DQ: We have a firm commitment to NATO. We are part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are part of Europe.

RLR: And in this hemisphere there are volatile situations Colombia, Mexico, and other parts of Latin America.

DQ: I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and my only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so that I could converse with those people.

RLR: In addition you have also been mentioned in connection with several other cabinet posts. I'd like to go through them one at a time and get your reaction. First, Health and Human Services, which seems a natural given your strong position on family values.

DQ: Republicans understand the bondage between a mother and child. Furthermore, illegitamacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having.

RLR: Education. Which is a major issue in the campaign.

DQ: We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world. One thing to remember, Bob. Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.

RLR: The EPA, which you have experience dealing with from your days running the Council on Competativeness.

DQ: It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

RLR: Drug Czar.

DQ: What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true it is.

RLR: Putting all the speculation aside, I've known you a long time, and I know there's only one job in the administration that interests you…and that's running NASA.

DQ: You right there, Bob. For NASA, space is still a high priority. It's time for the human race to enter the solar system.

RLR: Does that include a manned mission to Mars?

DQ: Mars is essentially in the same orbit…Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe.

RLR: Returning to Earth, all indications are that we are going to see this trend of record low voter turnout continue indefinately. Can you comment on this?

DQ: A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

RLR: Survey after survey has indicated that this voter apathy is a result of the endless partisan bickering and finger-pointing that has engulfed our nation's capitol.

DQ: I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican.

RLR: Right you are, my friend, right you are. On a personal note, I hear that you're spending a lot of your time on the left coast.

DQ: I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.

RLR: Well, until duty calls, Dan, work on that handicap.

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