1/22/99 Midnight Becomes You "What are you doing for New Year's Eve, Chris?" his Mom asked. "Nothing much shaking this year" Chris replied. This sort of witty exchange helped them both take their minds off the reality that Chris was living with his Mom after his surgery and needed her assistance while he recovered. He tried to be as independent as possible but was having a difficult time since his PD had progressed to the point where surgery was the only option left other than giving up. Chris' Mom wanted him to go out and have fun with his friends, a small circle of old schoolmates who tried to incorporate Chris in their social activities, but Chris rarely went. He was scared that he might lose his balance or worse, wet himself, and this type of fear was at the core of his refusals. The phone rang as Chris' Mom answered it. "Hi, Miss Kinesia, is Chris there?" the young man asked. "Certainly, David, I'll get him" she said and muffled the phone as she called him to the phone. "Hey, David" Chris said "what's up?" "Three or four of us were going to the New Year's Eve celebration tonight in the downtown plaza...and Chris, we'll come and get you and drop you off afterwards, we'll stake out the bathrooms for you first thing, stay close to you at all times, and we'll be happy to hang on to your wallet or meds for you...did I cover all your concerns?". Chris realized it had been over ten years since he had taken part in a New Year's Eve party of any kind and decided to join them. "Yeah" Chris answered "that covers it allright....what time will you come by to get me?" "We'll get you promptly at eleven...see you then" David replied and hung up. As Chris placed the phone down he pondered how he was gonna function that late at night. He was usually asleep by ten o'clock each night but he resolved not to let this become an excuse to back out of his commitment to join his friends. His only use of math these days was determining how much medicine to take and when. This rarely changed from day to day because Chris knew how much he needed to get safely to bed by ten o'clock. But tonight, he had to be "on" (functioning at his best) one hour later than that and stay that way for the next two hours. Chris didn't eat much of his dinner that night and drank a minimal amount of fluids in an effort to curtail needing to deal with portable toilets later in the evening. His body sensed that more was to be demanded of it tonight and Chris tried to remain quiet as much as possible. At ten o'clock, Chris took some Sinemet to be "on" by the time his friends arrived. He figured he'd take additional meds when they got downtown that would allow his body to "keep on keeping on" to the end of the celebration. He went upstairs and changed from his tattered sweat-pants to a nicer pair of sweats for this evening (surgery or not, buttons and zippers were tough to deal with in emergency situations and Chris had long ago stopped caring what people thought of his attire). He shed his old T-shirt and was struggling to get into a fresh one when his Mother walked by his room and asked "Would you like some help?". "No" Chris snapped at her through the folds of the T-shirt that seemed to be strangling him. His Mom said nothing and waited. "Mom, I'm sorry I barked at you...I just get tired of needing help with the simplest of things...like this shirt" he stated with tears in his voice as he pulled the new shirt on. "I know, Chris...bless your heart...it's not fair..." as her voice began to break too. "Please don't YOU start or we'll have a fully operational pity-party in no time" Chris added and felt himself smile at her as his medicine started to take hold. This evening might just work out allright after all. Chris was "on" by the time his friends arrived and they welcomed him warmly as he got into the car. He chattered away as he related the more positive aspects of his days to his friends. His days weren't really as good as he indicated but people don't like to hear about the real continuous struggles of the disabled. Chris felt very lucky to have people willing to make the effort to include him in their holiday celebrations. It was 11:30 by the time they arrived and found a parking place several blocks from the crowded downtown square. Two of his friends agreed to meet them by the statue in the plaza just before midnight and disappeared into the throng. As David and Chris made their way through the crowds, he recognized many people and spoke to a few as they pushed their way into the heart of the activity. People were shouting to be heard above the ever increasing din. David asked Chris "You doing okay. buddy?" as he saw Chris' limp begin to show and saw his eyes take in the crowds and activity. Chris' voice was hard to hear above the hustle and bustle "Yeah, I'm starting to switch off but I'll be okay" and added "would you ..." David second-guessed him "Nearest porta-potty, Chris? Wait here and I'll find it". Chris was beginning to "switch off" and saw he was pushing his body into unknown territory, venturing into the dense crowds and noise so late at night, but he tried to keep a positive outlook. He was limping and slowing down; he scanned the crowds for David's familiar head. He knew he should take some more Sinemet soon if he was gonna make it through the next hour. Chris reached in his pockets and just managed to extract his pillbox with the tips of his fingers. As he opened the container, it was knocked from his hands by a passerby and he saw it fall among the feet of the revelers. As he bent to retrieve it, he lost his balance and pitched forward on the street. Panic set in as Chris struggled to regain his footing. If anyone should notice him lying there, they would only assume they're viewing someone who had exceeded their limit before midnight arrived. "This has to be some sort of nightmare" Chris thought as he tried to stand up. His arms simply didn't have the strength to support his body weight. He was being trampled by the people above him who were partying and enjoying the festivities and didn't see him lying there. His bladder felt like it would empty itself momentarily. David returned from his search and looked for Chris' figure among the crowd. He stood on a fire hydrant to get a better look and shouted Chris' name. Then, checking his watch, he assumed that since it was four minutes till midnight, Chris had gone to meet their friends at the statue. He muttered to himself as he made his way toward the statue, "I wonder how Chris solved his bathroom dilemma?". Chris was, in fact, fifteen feet away from David but his cries were not heard through the noise of he crowd. He was thinking "What do I need now if no one is gonna stop and help me? .....Sinemet!". He quickly looked around him there on the asphalt and saw brown and yellow pills scattered amongst the hundreds of feet around him and managed to reach three mostly undamaged pills without his hands being stepped on. Someone above spilled some beer which fell on Chris' hand, partially wetting the pills. Chris took two of the beer-coated Sinemet that were left and swallowed them as the countdown began above him. "Nine...eight..." He curled into a semi-fetal position as the noise intensified above him. If he could just lie here safely until the crowd cleared enough for his friends to find him...or when the Sinemet kicks in, he could get up and try to locate his buddies. His bladder reminded him of where his priorities should be focused but this too would only be possible after the meds kicked in. "Six...five..." the crowd chanted. Chris reflected that this horrible chain of events appeared to have been turned around due to his quick (though cloudy) thinking. "Three...two...ONE! Happy New Year 1999!" the crowd roared as couples embraced and everyone toasted the New Year. A woman above him was pushed his direction and fell on top of him, causing his bladder to let go in a rush. Chris lay there, feeling very much disabled, shame over wetting himself and self-pity for not being able to get up off the ground by himself. As the woman got to her feet, he began to cry. What more could go wrong? "Chris, I can't believe I found you" the woman said to him excitedly. Chris looked up when he recognized the voice. "Ann?" he said tentatively as he gazed up at the woman. It really was Ann O'Reksia, his girlfriend from years past.....she still had a slender beautiful figure. "David and the rest of us have been looking like mad for you..are you allright" she said as she helped him to his feet. "Yeah, I'm okay right now but I'm waiting for my medicine to start working" Chris mumbled to her and added "But what are you...?" "I'm moving back to town. David and the rest of us were gonna surprise you at midnight but when David arrived asking if we'd seen you, we knew something must have happened" she said. Chris wiped away his tears and said "Gee, Ann, you don't know how great it is to see you" as his voice caught. "Chris Kinesia, I love you!" she said and held him close and kissed him as the crowd sang "Auld Lang Syne" around them. Chris turned to the readers, winked, said "Sometimes, PD or no PD, things just work out..... Happy New Year, everyone!" as he and Ann returned to their kiss.