What Keeps Me Going?
Abdul Olugbala Shakur,
C-48884 P.O. Box 7500 (D-8-211), Crescent City, CA 95532
One must possess a strong will to fight in order to survive
the inevitable psychological deterioration of being confined to isolation.
We would all like to believe that we are free from the repression of isolation.,
but no one can escape the psychological/ emotional damage. The harsh extremities
of solitary confinement is an incubator hatching the psychotic eggs of anxiety
disorders, mood disorders, schizophrenia, anti-social personality, somatization,
multiple personality disorders, manic-depression, severe cognitive impairment,
obsessive compulsive disorders and panic attacks, which all too often lead
to alcohol and drug abuse and the revictimization of society at large!
Lady Insane is her name. Prison is her place, for she has reigned over this
concrete terror for centuries, the princess of psychotic seduction, the
ultimate liaison of brain damage. It is often impossible to resist the softness
of her attraction and warmth of her comfort. I am no exception to the rule.
My isolation has caused me to become too damn serious. I think about the
struggle 24 hours a day. It is now an obsession, no doubt facilitated by
my isolation. I rarely speak on anything else. I live to struggle and struggle
to live.
What keeps me going? How do I stay balanced? My whole life revolves around
serving my People, who are suffering. In fact, too many children are suffering
at the hands of adult stupidity, ignorance and greed. I have plenty of time
to party in the Here After, but for now my life belongs to the People.
In spite of what my keepers may say about Abdul, I don't have an evil heart.
I may never get out of this place, but I will never use it as an excuse
to stop fighting for Black justice and liberation!