THE AVIATION GLOSSARY


Airfoil - Reynolds Wrap for manufacturing aircraft wings.

Airspeed - Speed of an airplane. Deduct 25%  when 
           listening to a Navy pilot.

Angle of Attack - Pick-up lines that pilots use.

Arresting Gear - A Policeman's equipment.

Bank - The folks who hold the lien on most pilots' cars.

Barrel Roll - Sport enjoyed at squadron picnics, usually after
              the barrels are empty.

Carburetor Icing - A phenomenon happening to Aero club pilots
                   at exactly the same time they run out of gas.

Cone of Confusion - An area about the size of New Jersey located  
                    near the final approach beacon at an airport.

Crab - The squadron Ops. Officer.

Dead Reckoning - You reckon correctly, or you are.

Engine Failure - A condition which occurs when all fuel tanks 
                 become filled with air.

Firewall - Section of the aircraft specially designed to let
           heat and smoke enter the cockpit.

Glide Distance - Half the distance from an airplane to the        
                 nearest emergency landing field.

Hydroplane - An airplane designed to land on a wet runway,
             20,000 feet long.

IFR - A method of flying by needle and ripcord.

Lean Mixture - Non-alcoholic beer.

Motor - Word used by student pilots and Yankees when 
        referring to the engine.

Nanosecond - Time delay built into the stall warning system.

Parasitic Drag - A pilot who bums a ride back and complains
                 about the service.

Range - Usually about 30 miles beyond the point where all
        fuel tanks fill with air.


Rich Mixture - What you order at the other guy's promotion
               party.

Roger - Used when you're not sure what else to say.

Roll - The first design priority for a fully loaded KC-135A.

Service Ceiling - Altitude at which cabin crews can serve drinks.

Spoilers - The Federal Aviation Administration.

Stall - Technique used to explain to the bank why your car        
        payment is late.

Steep Bank - Banks that charge pilots more than 10% interest.

Tactics - What a clock sounds like when it needs fixing.

Tail Wind - Results from eating beans, often causing Oxygen
            deficiency in the immediate vicinity.

Turn & Bank Indicator - An instrument highly ignored by pilots.

Useful Load - Volumetric capacity of the aircraft, 
               disregarding weight of cargo.

Up - A chant used by pilots taking off from Colorado Springs,
     who want to discover the meaning of life.

VOR - Radio navigation aid, named after the VORtex effect
      of pilots trying to home in on it.

Windsocks - Socks that need darning.

Yankee - Any pilot that asks Houston tower to "Say again".

Zero - Style and artistry points earned for a gear-up landing.


From: Ray