Title: Top 20 Engineering Phrases: Translated

  TOP 20 ENGINEERING PHRASES: INTERPRETED 
     
     
1.  A NUMBER OF DIFFERENT APPROACHES ARE BEING TRIED.  - We are still pissing 
in the wind.
     
2.EXTENSIVE  REPORT IS BEING PREPARED ON A FRESH APPROACH TO THE PROBLEM.  - 
We just hired 3 kids fresh out of college.
     
3.  CLOSE PROJECT COORDINATION.  - We know who to blame.
     
4.  MAJOR TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH.  - It works OK, but looks very hi-tech.
     
5.  CUSTOMER SATISFACTION IS DELIVERED/ASSURED.  - We are so far behind 
schedule the customer is happy to get it delivered.
     
6.  PRELIMINARY OPERATIONAL TESTS WERE INCONCLUSIVE.  - The damn thing blew 
up
when we threw the switch.
     
7.  THE RESULTS WERE EXTREMELY GRATIFYING.  - We are surprised that the 
stupid
thing works at all.
     
8.  THE ENTIRE CONCEPT WILL HAVE TO BE ABANDONED.  - The only person who 
understood the thing quit.
     
9.  IT IS IN THE PROCESS.  - It is so wrapped up in red tape that the 
situation is hopeless.
     
10.  WE WILL LOOK INTO IT.  - Forget it!  We have enough problems for now.
     
11.  PLEASE NOTE AND INITIAL.  - Let's spread the responsibility for the 
screw
up.
     
12.  GIVE US THE BENEFIT OF YOUR THINKING.  - We'll listen to what you have 
to
say as long as it doesn't interfere with what we've already done.
     
13.  GIVE US YOUR INTERPRETATION.  - I can't wait to hear this bull!
     
14.  SEE ME or LET'S DISCUSS.  - I really don't give a rip but I'll pretend 
to
listen!
     
15.  ALL NEW.  - Parts not interchangeable with the previous design.
     
16.  RUGGED.  - Too damn heavy to lift.
     
17.  LIGHTWEIGHT.  - Lighter than RUGGED.
     
18.  YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT.  - One finally worked.
     
19.  ENERGY SAVING.  - Achieved when the power switch is off.
     
20.  LOW MAINTENANCE.  - Impossible to fix if broken.

From: Mark