Title: What Men Say vs. What They Mean

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     THE TRUTH IS OUT
     
     What Men say...vs...what they mean.....
     
     "I'm hungry" = I'm hungry.
     "I'm sleepy" = I'm sleepy.
     "I'm tired" = I'm tired.
     "I've gotta pee" = Get out of the way.
     "I've gotta GO" = Get out of the way and stay away until it clears. 
     "Can I call you sometime?"  = I'd eventually like to have sex with 
     you. 
     "Do you want to go to a movie?"  = I'd eventually like to have sex 
     with you.
     "Can I take you out to dinner?"  = I'd eventually like to have sex 
     with you.
     "Can I get your coat?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you. 
     "Let me get your door." = I'd eventually like to have sex with you. 
     "May I have this dance?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.

     "Nice dress!" = Nice cleavage!
     "You look tense, let me give you a massage." = I want to fondle you.

     "What's wrong?" = I don't see why are you making such a big deal out

     of this.
     "What's wrong?" = What meaningless, self-inflicted, psychological 
     trauma are you going through now?
     "What's wrong?" = I guess sex tonight is out of the question. 
     "I'm bored." = Do you want to have sex?
     "I love you." = Let's have sex now.
     "I love you too." = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now! 
     "Good morning." = That was great sex......let's have more!
     "See you later." = That was great sex......let's have more!
     "Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = I liked it better before.

     "Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = $50 and it doesn't look 
     that much different!
     "Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = For $50 they should have 
     GIVEN you hair!
     "Let's talk."= I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a
deep 
     person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me.
     "Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex

     with other guys.
     "Will you marry me?" = I might as well get tax benefits for going 
     through these "talks"
     
     While shopping:
     
     "Yes, that one's nice" = Why do you ask when you aren't going to 
     listen anyway?
     "That one looks great on you" = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go

     home!
     "I like that one better." = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go
home! 
     "Uh huh" = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home!
     "I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together." = I am 
     gay.
     
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     Okay, equal time ... here's a shot at the women
     
     Women's Talk:  What she says and what she REALLY means!"
     
     "We need" = I want!
     "It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by
now! 
     "Do what you want" = You'll pay for this later!
     "We need to talk" = I need to complain!
     "Sure... go ahead" = I don't want you to do that.
     "You're so ... manly" = You need a shave and you smell of sweat. 
     "I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset, you moron.
     "The gas tank is empty" = Go fill it up. 
     "The trash is full" = Take it out
     "I want new curtains" = and carpeting, and furniture, and
wallpaper... 
     "I need wedding shoes" = the other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of 
     white. 
     "I heard a noise" = I noticed you were almost asleep.
     "Do you love me?" = I'm going to ask for something expensive. 
     "Nothing is wrong." = Everything is wrong.
     "Am I fat?" = Tell me I'm beautiful.
     "Are you listening!?" = Too late, you're dead.
     "Are you cold?" = Get out of bed and close the window! 
     "I'm NOT angry" = I'm pissed!
     "The dog is barking" = Go outside in the rain in your underwear and 
     see what is wrong.
     "You're certainly attentive tonight." = Is sex all you that ever
think 
     about?
     "I'm not emotional and I'm not overreacting!" = I'm having my
period. 
     "Be romantic and turn out the lights." = I have fat thighs.
     "This kitchen is so inconvenient" = I want a new house.
     "How much do you love me?" = I did something today you're really not

     going to like.
     "I don't want to talk about it." = Go away, I'm still building up 
     steam. 
     "I'll be ready in a minute." = Take off your shoes and find a good 
     football game on T.V.
     "You have to learn to communicate." = Just agree with me.
     "What do you think of my new hair style?" = Say it's beautiful - if 
     you value your life.
     "Tell me the truth about my new dress." = Lie through your teeth
     
    
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From: Ray