Did everyone get what they wanted for Christmas?  The holiday 
gift-giving stats are in!  Some of the more popular gifts for the
computer adict this year include such items as:

- CD-ROM rewinder.  (For blondes only.)

- Virtual reality beer.

- NoseBlaster smell card -- the latest in multi-media technology.  The
  deluxe version comes with direct-feed nostril tubes for the ultimate
  in virtual olfactory experience.

- True-Type font modelled on my handwriting.  The last word in
  non-reversible encryption.  (May not be exported from the country.)

- 72-inch monitor.

- 20-foot mouse extension cord - a must for the 72-inch monitor.

- Michael Jackson-to-Michael Jackson Morph screen saver -- endless
  variations.

- Bedpan -- Why leave your computer just for that?  (Not for use with
  NoseBlaster.)

- The secret to what this emoticon means - }:{o

- The monitor with the built in Dorito and pop can holder.

- Keyboard with a "zap" button which zaps other people on the 
Internet.

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The future is like the present, only longer...