Lovers, Boyfriends, and Snugglebuddies

The men who are dearest to me are listed here in reverse chronological order of the time in which we had an intimate relationship. The icons represent the animal identity I ascribed to each of them based on the nature of our relationship and their personality traits. (Sorry, but you'll have to guess the details [:-)].)

Sanford R. Dole (27KB JPEG) () is my ever-loving husbear, so you'll find his biography on my Family page. We met thru a personal ad that I placed in a local gay newspaper entitled "Seeking Snugglebuddy". The rest, as they say, is history.

David E. Murphy (215KB JPEG) () is my current boyfriend. We initially met online and then met in the real world at a Sundance Association-sponsored country/western hoedown at the Russian River in July of 2001. Besides dancing, snuggling, and various other intimate activities of an ursine nature, we enjoy eating together (Dave is a wonderful cook), walks on the beach and in the redwood forests, and watching old Simpsons episodes. Dave likes the water, hence the handle AquaKub (the side icon is a polar bearcub leaping into a pool of water, in case you cannot tell). I usually call him LoveCub, 'cause that's what cubs are for. He has other pet names, butt I'm not telling! Dave also is an avid reader, has taken up creative writing, and is remodeling his cabin in Occidental.

David Scott Farrar (38KB JPEG) () is my current snugglebuddy and occasional country/western dance partner. Besides snuggling and dancing, we share interests in all things Californian, maps, and gay/lesbian rights. With my encouragement, Scott took up square dancing and now dances several levels above me! He currently is in a primary relationship with a square-dancing bear formerly from Long Beach.

Michael A. Garcia (28KB GIF) () and I were snugglebuddies for about nine months, ending in the spring of 1996. We had a mutually secondary relationship (that is, we both had other, primary relationships concurrently). Michael was born and raised in El Paso, TX, and works as a WebMaster for Sun Microsystems, where we met. He volunteers copious amounts of his time to numerous worthy causes, such as GYRO's World of Terror and the California AIDS Ride. Square dancing is one of Michael's major passions, altho we mainly related on the country/western dance floor. Our relationship was unusual for me in not only the obvious age and ethnic differences, but Michael is the first non-musician with whom I have had an intimacy-based relationship.

Meredith D. Karns (4KB JPEG) () and I were regular country/western dance partners and occasional snugglebuddies for about two years, ending in early 1995. I initially met him thru Joseph Salack in 1991 while Meredith was visiting The City from his native Iowa, but I re-met him independently at a country/western hoedown one year later during another visit. Shortly thereafter I introduced him to Greg Winsby (another Lutheran two-stepper), with whom he developed a primary relationship in The City until Greg's death in early 1993. In January of 1995, Meredith moved back to Iowa. I hear from him via e-mail occasionally and get word of him thru Tom Sidebottom, with whom he has a professional connection (which I initiated). Besides being an accomplished ballroom and country/western dancer, Meredith plays classical piano and violin and sings tenor. Professionally, he and his brother own a printing business in Iowa, Morgan Meredith.

Joseph Salack (24KB JPEG) and I met thru a personal ad that I placed in a local newspaper a year or so after Tom Sidebottom and I ended our primary relationship. Joseph and I dated for about a year, until he completed his graduate studies in psychology in The City and returned to New Mexico to seek employment. We see each other about annually, when one of us travels to the other's city. By avocation, Joseph is a jazz pianist. He also sings on occasion with the New Mexico Gay Men's Chorus.

[unicorn] Thomas O. Sidebottom () and I met thru a professional matchmaker in 1979. We became domestic partners the following summer and lived together until the end of 1990, just a few months following what we considered to be our eleventh anniversary. Tom was a chemist when I met him, but he became a software engineer early during our relationship. (He even audited a course I taught as a computer science professor at San Francisco State University.)

[pussycat] William F. Bromm was my first love. Bill died in 1979 at the tender young age of 28, so you'll find our story on my Saints page.