-- BRUTISH COLUMBIA --
JUSTICE WAS LOUD - [lilting dulcimer]
18 August 2005 - Buckinghorse River, BC
They hanged him on Friday from the Justice Tree
It was the best hanging they'd had all week
The crowd ate peanuts and drank beer and soda
Ya couldn't a'had a better hanging if ya'd tried
The crowd ate and drank until he died
-
The trial was fast and short and sweet
His lawyer made all sortsa weak excuses
Said he'd always been some kinda freak
The jury didn't have much truck with freaks
They hanged a freak about every other week
-
[chorus:]
The judge was strong and the jury was silent
Justice was loud and the rope was ready
Justice was loud and the rope was ready
-
His girl sat and cried all by herself
A box of roses lay withered on the shelf
Her family knew they couldn't say a word
The wind blew in the trees overnight
Little children danced naked in the moonlight
[chorus]
NOT CRAZY ENOUGH - [droopy western]
18 August 2005 - Buckinghorse River, BC
She came and asked me for a drink
The highlights caught in her hair
She asked me what I was thinking
I said that I didn't really care
-
[chorus:]
I'm not crazy enough but I'll do it anyway
You're not crazy enough but I know yer gonna stay
We're not crazy enough, whatever happens next
Not crazy enough, not crazy enough
-
She said she'd always been a prophet
Why should I care what she'd seen?
She said she'd always been a loner
So why did she come and bother me? [chorus]
-
The jukebox played something or other
It drowned out most of the traffic noise
She asked me if she could have another
She said she didn't know about boys [chorus]
-
Just another prophet in the City
Just another saint on Lombard Street
Another werewolf out singing somewhere
Just another nightmare in the sheets [chorus]
ST JOHN & ST JAMES - [bass & drums]
18 August 2005 - Buckinghorse River, BC
St John and St James have their stations
Up in north BC, and they struggle
Against evil and sin and frustration
-
The forests run on forever
St John and St James always labor
To be not swept away by the weather
-
St John and St James eat old sawdust
And breathe fresh petroleum air
Seasoned with rust and despair
-
St Stephen looks over the mountains
St John and St James watch the sky
It's always a good day to die
THREE LITTLE BEARS - [playful calliope]
19 August 2005 - Buckinghorse River, BC
Three little bears in the wood
Up to nothing no good
Playing with hikers and careless bikers
Just like little bears should
-
Three little bears chasing me
I don't know how long I can flee
I'll either live or I'll drown in a river
Or maybe be stuck up a tree
-
Three little bears and their mama
Can inflict considerable trauma
The prospect of being their dinner is seeming
Comedic, with a dash of drama
-
Three little bearskins look fine
On my wall as I sit sipping wine
I feel a bit woozy as I clean my Uzi
And count bullet holes, there's just nine
SOMETHING'S FALLING - [techno dirge]
19 August 2005 - near Ft Nelson, BC
The hospitals are nearly full; there's long lines
Waiting in the rain like lonely lovers (lovers)
There's smoke on the horizon and smoke in their eyes
And something burning — I'm roasting over (over)
Sometheing burning in the night again
-
Nobody is smiling — something's broken again (again)
Heaps on the outskirts are smoldering, smoking
Riot and rape and rampage and rage in the neighborhoods
Loud music and it isn't very good (no good) (no good)
Loud music seeping out of the haunted woods
-
I can't tell anybody just what's wrong (wrong)
It's going on forever, it's going on too long
Sirens sing like thirty tenors in stereo
Something's fallen, very loud, very very slow
Something's fallen wherever I go
-
[instrumental]
-
We're all flagellants, and I'm the chiefest of all
They say belief has been our downfall (downfall)
Something falling on top of us all
Something falling on top of us all
Something falling on top of us all
NOW THEY JUST DO IT BY COMPUTER
20 August 2005 - near Ft Nelson, BC
She used to love him in so many ways
Ways that can't even be talked about now
Inside and outside, upside and downside
Skinless and boneless and mindless and phoneless
-
[chorus:]
Now they just do it by computer
Now they just do it by computer
-
She used to love him in so many places
Canada and Paraguay and Finland and Morocco
Relaxing and loving and living and loving
In all the barracuda capitols of the world
[chorus]
-
[bridge:]
Love in the bridal suites
With derivative hunks of magic meat
Love in the orchestra pits,
Swamped by music of the universe
Loving like barracudas and muskrats
And brontosaurs and monkeys
Blood on the bone, blood down the drain
And where it wont't wash out again
[instrumental]
-
She used to love him in so many moods
More fun committing crimes than solving them
She loved him with plastic and metal and woods
She loved him in the produce aisles and bulk goods
[chorus]
TIME TIME TIME - [fox trot]
22 August 2005 - near Ft Nelson, BC
In 1912, when the world was young
Before there were atoms and Jimi Hendrix
In 1912, when Madonna was young
All the men wore bearskins, all the women went naked
Dinosaurs and giant mammoths roamed the earth
My great grandpapa told me all about it, 1912
-
[chorus:]
Time time time
Time has come today
Time is here to stay
Time is on our side
Time is such a bitch
Time time time
-
Now it's today, the world is so old
Jimi has died and Madonna will too
Dinosaurs and elephants are in museums now
We've got atoms and lasers and Playstations II
Some of the mean wear suits, some of the women go naked
I'll tell my latest clones all about it, someday
[chorus]
THE COAST OF CARIBOO - [period ballad]
22 August 2005 - near Ft Nelson, BC
Icy winds in the trees, icy waves on the seas
Ice and snow on everything as far as man can see
And a flock of murderous penguins chasing me
When I commenced to go
To the coast of Cariboo
To the coast of Cariboo
-
Yes I'd heard the word from the touts and the leeches
There was gold in the draws, there was silver in the reaches
And some kind of monster walrus patrolling the beaches
Yet I determined to go
To the coast of Cariboo
To the coast of Cariboo
-
It was as they said, there was wealth all around
There was wealth in the water, there was wealth in the ground
And many unwary seekers left their bones lying 'round
The very day that I did stay
On the coast of Cariboo
On the coast of Cariboo
-
I took wealth where I found it, I found wealth where it came
Until wealth dripped from my pockets & my nostrils & my name
It was ill-begotten wealth, but I loved it just the same
Until it dumped me in the loo
On the coast of Cariboo
On the coast of Cariboo
-
Now my time is short, my hours are so few
My wealth is all gone, and of course my health is too
I should have stayed in Boston, apprenticed to a Jew
Now wolverines will devour me; my bones the rats will chew
Yes I sealed my doom when I came
To the coast of Cariboo
To the coast of Cariboo
DEBBI CHO TAKES NO - [modern pop]
23 August 2005 - on the Tetsa River, BC
It's Debbi's night out, she's oh so happy
She does a crappy job for corporate pay
Dealing with morons every day
Dealing with morons every day
-
[chorus:]
But now it's Debbi's night out, Debbi's night out
But now it's Debbi's night out, Debbi's night out
-
Don't fock with Debbi if you value your life
She's got a long knife and an attitude
Even though she usually seems subdued
Tonight she might as well be nude [chorus]
-
It's Debbi's night out, she hasn't had a drink
She doesn't need to think about tomorrow
She's going somewhere the food's all raw
And she can play backgammon and read Thoreau [chorus]
-
It's Debbi's night out, happens now and then
Especially when the moon's just past full
And she almost feels the need to kill
And the old memories start to roll
And there's something sticking to the wall [chorus]
STEFAN'S GOT THE PLAGUE - [noisy rock]
24 August 2005 - on the Racing River, BC
Stefan stole an old grimoire
He's gonna work some magick (magick)
Stefan's getting so excited
His little nipples are getting hard, but
-
[chorus:]
Stefan's got the plague, Stefan's got the plague
No wonder he can't get laid, Stefan's got the plague
-
Stefan draws a pentagram
With chalk and wax and magic herbs
And blood from just the right bird
It helps that Stefan's a nerd, but [chorus]
-
[bridge:]
Why can't he win the world (the world)?
Why can't he get some girls (any girls)?
Why does he make them want to hurl (hurl)?
-
Stefan's heart is broken again
Magick didn't work any better than
His xray eyes or his electric ties
Stefan's sure he's gonna die, and [chorus]
YOU'RE STILL A MYSTERY TO ME - [folky]
24 August 2005 - on the Racing River, BC
I never know what to expect from you
A tongue down my throat
Or spiderwebs on my face
Or an ovipositor someplace
I never know what you'll say or do
-
[chorus:]
You're still a mystery to me - should I worry?
You're still a mystery to me - should I hurry?
You're still a mystery to me - should I marry you?
-
I never know what to expect each day
Some brilliant poem or song
Or something dead at the door
Or something crawling on the floor
I never know what you'll do or say [chorus]
-
I never know what I'll find each night
Hands and mouth that won't quit
Or ashes in the candlelight
Or something wrapped up too tight
Now, what are you going to do with that? [chorus]
-
I never know who or what you are
Are you really another species
Or maybe from another spacetime
Or my own Bride of Frankenstein?
Someday I'll wish upon a star [chorus]
SASQUATCH'S LAST STAND - [hip-hoppy]
25 August 2005 - on the Racing River, BC
Sasquatch walks like a pimp through the forest
Much quieter than you'd expect
Something bright wrapped around a hairy neck
Trailing a silent chorus
-
Sasquatch scared a hiker who dropped
Her iPod on the ground, so
Sasquatch now walks around
With a bellyful of sound
-
Sasquatch tastes the water and air
So many hydrocarbons there
So many humans so nearby
Maybe it's time for a Yukon goodbye
THE LAND OF THE WENDIGO - [night music]
25 August 2005 - on the Racing River, BC
He headed north from Winnipeg
Across forests and muskeg, a million small lakes
He headed north from Winnipeg
With a knife strapped to his leg
-
He passed the North and the Far North
'Wondered what the High Arctic was worth
Up to the land of ice and snow
The realm of the Wendigo
-
[chorus:]
Beware the land of ice and snow
The realm of the Wendigo
-
A drunk Cree gal had told him the story
But not very much, they never talk much
Just, "Don't chase the diamonds, Joe.
Don't you trail the Wendigo" [chorus]
-
But Joe kept going north and dug in the ground
And diamonds he found 'neath the grey permafrost
But he heard the sound and knew he was lost
And taken by the Wendigo [chorus]
IT DOESN'T REALLY MATTER - [funky dobro]
25 August 2005 - on the Racing River, BC
I'm so sorry I bombed you
I thought you were the enemy
I'm so sorry your town is gone
I'm so sorry your family's dead
But it doesn't really matter
'Cause you're shredded
You won't testify against me
-
I'm so sorry I fired at you
I thought you were the target
I aimed carefully and pulled the trigger
Tracers brightly lit the scend
But it really doesn't matter
'Cause you're creamed
The world will soon forget
-
I'm so sorry I destroyed your country
I thought you really deserved it
Even though you never did me any harm
Even though everybody tried to warn me
Bit it doesn't really matter
Once the war is over
There's always another war ahead
JUST A SHADOW TALKING - [honky-tonk]
25 August 2005 - on the Racing River, BC
When I was young, everything grew in
Back then I was really thin
Take a look at me then, go
Take a look at me then
-
When I got older, everything grew out
I was getting kinda stout
Stuffed it all in my mouth, I
Stuffed everything in my mouth
-
Then I aged more, everything fell out
Hair, teeth, fingers, brains
I started going insane, just
Really started going insane
-
Now everything's gone, I'm thin again
So there's nothing left to blame
And I'm just a shadow talking
Yes I'm just a shadow talking
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