The SACRED OTTER REPUBLIC Of CALIFORNIA

The SACRED OTTER REPUBLIC Of CALIFORNIA (S.C.R.O.C.) is established as a limited theocracy. THE GREAT OTTER (T.G.O.) rules as absolute potentate, generously heeding the wishes of all members, other deities and entities, and whomever else S/HE so desires, when and if S/HE so desires.

S.C.R.O.C. is governed by THE GREAT OTTER (T.G.O.), divinely represented by the Council of Cosmic Carnivores (C.C.C.), assiduously legislating according to the most sacred MUSTELID-PINNIPED DOCTRINES (M.P.D.), interpreting and analyzing and rationalizing the SILVER SELKIE SUTRA (S.S.S.) and other most holy works of revealed wisdom. No monotheists or other secularists or delusionals need apply, unless you wish to be devoured.

S.C.R.O.C. operates on double-tithes, not taxes; has virtual peace & holiness enforcers but no material cops or army; provides for free and fair elections of confessors and channelers; and establishes its road network only upon sacred ley-lines. Speed laws are strictly enforced.

S.C.R.O.C. still need an official image, an outline map of California overlaid with a recognizable otter silhouette, which some member shall draw up forthwith, eh?

IDENTIFICATION

IDENTIFICATION:   All members / subjects are granted divinity, titles, new names and fingerprints. All members will be issued an ID card bearing: picture, titles, name, D.O.B. (date of birth), address, sex(s) and availability, hair / eyes / ears / nose (yes/no), their totem animal, their divine status, and a proclamation of subjectship in this great Holy Republic. Membership and identification are non-transferable, except at the express whim of The Great Otter.

When was the S.C.R.O.C. founded? By whom?

The SACRED OTTER REPUBLIC Of CALIFORNIA (S.C.R.O.C.) has existed throughout all eternity, since the Big Band, the formation of the Solar System, and the current configuration of continents upon Earth. It has always been a favorite concept of the Great Otter. Its physical implementation dates to year 12,345,678,999 ABB (After Big Bang), called Year 1 SC (SCROC Calendar).

What does the first 'C' in SCROC represent?

The spelling is of occult significance and may not be discussed.

Shouldn't the acronym be S.R.O.C., not S.C.R.O.C.

I said, don't mess with that.

Is The Great Otter GLBTT?

You really don't want to mess with that, eh?

What are the relationships between the various SCROCs?

As expressed in Doctrine A4, Sacred Republics (SCROCs) are established in Caledonia, California, China, Corfu, Connecticut, Callisto, Cyprus, Calcutta, et al. They are all of equal importance to the Great Otter, although some are more equal than others. California is expecially beloved because of the offshore kelp beds and prevalance of cannabis cultivation.

Is there any connection between SCROC and SCROD and SCROB? If so, what is it?

Yes, but we can't go into that just now. Ask again later.

What is the difference between t'CotO and SCROC?

One is the spiritual arm, the other is the temporal arm, of The Great Otter.

Where are the borders of SCROC?

SCROC is unlimited by the space-time continuum. SCROC is everywhere: in the air, the water, your heart, your kidneys, your bank account, your lovers' erotic dreams, and various unnamed and unknowable realms.

Are there border guards, customs or immigration agents, stormtroopers, or other officials impeding access to and movement within SCROC?

Yes. They are all virtual / spiritual. That's how we keep the payroll costs low. Your crossing of a SCROC border should be totally transparent, should you be allowed in. Or out. And your movements within SCROC are only lightly monitored. Or so we would have you believe. You will generally find no impediments to travel, commercial or personal or ideological or sexual or random activities, self-expression or self-improvement or self-destruction, except as absolutely required to maintain the health, safety and security of SCROC.

Will I be screened for anthrax as I traverse SCROC?

Yes. Your mucus and blood will be taken and thoroughly analyzed, then sacrificed.

What are the rules of behaviour for members or visitors or subjects or whatever to t'CotO and/or SCROC?

These rules will be available online soon.

Why should I join SCROC or t'CotO or whatever?

It's in your own interest to do so. Trust me.

No, really. What's in it for ME?

Most importantly, all members of t'CotO and subjects of SCROC are granted divinity. You will not only be AS a god — you will BE a god. Use your powers with discretion.

If I'm a god / goddess, can I have sex anytime, anywhere, with any other consenting entity(s), be they human or alien or divine or virtual?

Yes. But don't frighten the neighbors or animals.

Sounds great! Where do I sign up?

Submit to THE GREAT OTTER! Submit! SUBMIT!!

DESECRATION

DEFILEMENT:   Non-believers and other secular scum have threatened to defile the Sacred Otter Republic of California, even going so far as the attempt to sieze temporal power with a so-called RECALL ELECTION. Click here for the sordid details. Needless to say, all those who fail to SUBMIT to THE GREAT OTTER are doomed, DOOMED!