THEY'RE GANGING UP ON ME (coplas) Novato, CA 8 Mar 2001 *
O the vampiros have taken my night-time
They're making me i-itch a-and scratch
O the vampiros have taken my baby
And I thought she was quite a catch
O the vampiros have ruined my evenings
They're making my life such a pain
O the vampiros have taken the night-time
Give me back (back) the night once again
-
The chupacabras have taken mi vacas
I ain't got no cows anymore
The chupacabras have taken my neighbors
Now nobody answers the door
The chupacabras have ruined my garden
They shit on the flowers and corn
The chupacabras are ru-in-ing my life
I wish I had nev-er ev-er been born
-
An evil brujo has taken my daughter
A pretty bruja has taken my son
The evil brujo, he took mi esposa
But I'm not really sad that she's gone
I wish the bruja would come back for me
I'd be hers for eter-ni-ty
I'll be her perro, I'll stay on the run
Yes we could have mu-cho mu-cho mas fun
-
[instr. & fade]
WEREWOLF AT THE AIRPORT Forestville, Calif 9 Mar 2001
I was once a werewolf at L.A. International
But that was such a long, long time ago, time ago
The rain was sour and acid, just the tint of piss
We hunted, singing languages that no-one could decipher
-
[chorus] It's not always easy, it's not always easy
A werewolf at the airport get's grimey and greasy
-
It was hard finding lunch in the smoggy season
Approximations of sunlight falling thru clouds of scum
But who hears the predators crawling thru ventilators?
Who cares for yuppies who never make it home?
[chorus]
-
A woman called me ASWANG and cried in Tagalog
She beat us to a taxi and went home to Diamond Bar
I avoided Hare Krishas, they always taste so bad
With black-market Bidis hanging smoky on their lips
[chorus]
-
There's California girls with tanned legs and eyeballs
And frisky day-glo jogging shoes, go running down the ramps
Some were easy catches, some we'd leave'em for the vamps
But I try to stay away from airports now, airports now
[chorus]
STREGAS EVERYWHERE (techno-folk) Forestville, CA 6 May 2001
The bacularia is flying at me, she's laughing
The facinatrix she gave me all sortsa evil eyes
The picidaria is smearing me up and down
--
[chorus:] There's stregas everywhere, everywhere, everywhere
--
The incantator she is making me dizzy, dizzy
The veneficia is making me sick, oh yick (yick yick)
The sortilega and the anispix and phitonissa [chorus]
--
[break:] Why did I have to come to Italy?
Why did I listen to that tourist guide?
Why all these witches coming at me, at me, at me?
--
The stioportius is joining the girls
He's gonna share me with his pontifex maximus
They'll take my blood, I'll just be another victima [chorus]
YOU'RE ALWAYS CHANGING SHAPES (doo-wop) Forestville, CA 10 May 2001
You're always changing shapes on me
I don't know what you'll be next
A wolf, a cat, a seal, a bat
A reptile of any sex
A reptile of any old sex
--
You're always changing shapes on me
Last night you were a grizzly bear
I didn't mind the teeth and claws
But I couldn't stand the hair
No, I couldn't take all the hair
--
[chorus:]
I love you when you're changing shapes
So fluid and so strong
Beyond right and wrong, beyond short and long
Beyond thin and thong
--
You're always changing shapes on me
It's a pure politcal act
You're never trapped by principles
You're never tricked by facts
No, never ever tricked by facts
--
You're always changing shapes on me
A tarantula in my dreams
You're always exactly what you want
And never what you seem
You're never quite what you seem [chorus]
--
You're always changing shapes on me
And feeding on the weak and slow
I put up with your restlessness
Because I love you so
Just 'cause I love you so
I YEARN FOR YETI New Washoe City, NV 13 May 2001
I yearn for Yeti with the soft brown hair
And the soft brown eyes and the soft brown thighs
I yearn for Yeti to unload my cares
But where has my Yeti gone? Where has my Yeti gone?
--
I dream of Yeti with the great slow heart
And the great long teeth and the big wet farts
I dream of Yeti loaded in my cart
But where has my Yeti gone? Where, where has my Yeti gone?
--
[break:]
There's plenty of Yeti when the day is done
Plenty of Yeti when we're having fun
Plenty of Yeti to unload my gun
But where has my Yeti gone?
There's plenty of Yeti, kiss away my tears
Plenty of Yeti when we drink our beers
Plenty of Yeti for my golden years
But where has my Yeti gone gone gone?
[instrumental]
--
I long for Yeti with the full red leps
And the bright red nostrils and tight red nipples
I long for Yeti's talented fingertips
But where has my Yeti gone? Tell me, where has my Yeti gone?
THANKS BUT NO THANKS New Washoe City, NV 13 May 2001
Thank you for making me a vampire
It's so great to be immortal
Damn you for making me a vampire
I'll never eat pizza again
--
[chorus:] Being vampiric has its ups and downs
Thanks but no thanks, thanks but no thanks...
--
Thank you for making me a vampire
I can suck life from everyone
Damn you for making me a vampire
Blood stains are so hard to clean [chorus]
--
Thank you for making me a vampire
I love having incredible strength
Damn you for making me a vampire
I used to like my day job [chorus]
UNDEAD IN YOUR HEART (techno-metal) Sebastopol, CA 21 May 2001
[chorus:] Undead in your heart
Undead in your heart, undead in your heart
--
Undead in the alleys, undead in the tubes
Undead in the streets [chorus]
Undead in the valleys, undead in the hills
Undead in the heat [chorus]
--
Undead in the lifts, undead in the loos
Undead in the dark [chorus]
Undead in the rifts, undead in the zoos
Undead in the parks [chorus]
--
Undead in the pools, undead in the stores
Undead in the schools [chorus]
Undead in the scales, undead in the courts
Undead in the jails [chorus]
--
Undead in the pews, undead in the ranks
Undead on the rails [chorus]
Undead in the pubs, undead in the tanks
Undead on the trails [chorus]
--
Undead in the heat, undead in the cold
Undead in the rain [chorus]
Undead in the meat, undead in the mold
Undead in the pain [chorus]
--
Undead in the cars, undead in the bars
Undead in the bends [chorus]
Undead at the starts, undead in the mids
Undead at the ends [chorus]
--
Undead in the loves, undead in the hates
Undead in the fears [chorus]
Undead in the shoves, undead in the fates
Undead in the here, here, here, here
[chorus]
GHOUL OF MY DREAMS (bluesy honkytonk) Sebastopol, CA 21 May 2001
She's been unborn, but not unbegotten
She's been undead, but not unforgotten
--
[chorus]
She's the ghoul of my dreams
I'm dreaming of her tonight
--
She's been unsaved but not unrepentent
She's been usused by not unfrequented [chorus]
--
[break:] The flesh she tears may be your own
That thang she's chewing might be your bone
She's maybe better just left alone
But just try, try, try, try, try...
--
She's been uncursed but not unblessed
She's been unshorn but not undressed [chorus]
I WANT TO HAVE YOU (You're So Delectible) Sebastopol, CA 21 May 2001
Say you'll stay all night
I can drain you by moonlight
I want to have you for breakfast
You're so delectible
--
Say you'll stay all morning
I'll munch on you with just the slightest warning
I want to have you for lunch
You're so delectible
--
[break:]
And for an afternoon snack
I'll lay you on your back
Nibble down from nose to crack
All washed down with applejack
--
Say you'll stay all evening
I'll dine on you before leaving
I want to have you for supper
You're so delectible
(I Was Having An) AFTERLIFE CRISIS (Celtic) Sebastopol, CA 21 May 2001
I was having an afterlife crisis
The hunters were getting near
They weren't responding with fear, with fear
--
I was having an afterlife crisis
The ozone layer gave way
Nighttime turned to day, to day
--
I was having an afterlife crisis
The hounds were at my heels
My nerves were starting to peel, to peel
--
I was having an afterlife crisis
Everybody was wearing a cross
All my coffins were mucky with moss, with moss
--
I was having an afterlife crisis
It's good that I moved near Venice Pier
Nobody will notice me here, here, here
UnBORN To Be WILD (rock) Forestville, CA 21 May 2001
I's conceived in a cyclone
Gestated like a hell-child
I was such a fearsome fetus
--
[chorus] I was unborn to be wild, unborn to be wild
--
I sucked up her blood and vino
Just another vampire embryo
My arteries are prehensile [chorus]
--
[break:]
You'll love me more before I'm born than after
'Cause death's a life and life is a disaster
You'll wish you hanged me from a burning rafter
--
I've got the strength of the Golem
I'm changing shapes like a werewolf
I'm such a fearsome fetus [chorus]
BE MY LITTLE LOVE ZOMBIE (rocksteady) Rio Vista, CA 10 Apr 2002
[chorus:]
Be my little love zombie, be my little love zombie
Be my little love zombie, be my little love zombie
-
The sun is going down, you can be my little love zombie
Doing what I'm saying, saying what I'm doing [chorus]
-
The moon is coming up, you can be my little love zombie
Moving in the shadows, shading in the movies [chorus]
-
The stars are sweeping past, you can be my little love zombie
Falling into dreams, dreaming of the fall [chorus]
-
The eclipse is over, you can be my little love zombie
Lost in the beauty, beautiful in the loss
Lost in the rapture, rapturous in the loss
Lost in the lonliness, lonely at the loss
Lost in the agony, agonized at the loss [chorus]
ELEMENTAL THRILLS (lush pop) Santa Rosa, CA 24 Apr 2002
She dreamed she was a Nazi vampire
And he was a Communist werewolf
And they had elemental thrills
Hunting through the night
Hiding from the light
-
He dreamed he was the King of Doom
And she was the Queen of Death
And they had elemental thrills
As little ghouls bowed before them
As humanoids fell before them
-
[bridge:] Can we ever see
The politics of immorality?
The theology of immortality?
-
She dreamed she wasn't just dreaming
And he wasn't dreaming too
And they had elemental thrills
Working holocausts
Sucking hot exhausts
WHEN THEY LANDED HERE (ska) Santa Rosa, CA 29 Apr 2002
When they landed here, they said they were gods
Who was I to doubt them? Who was I to doubt them?
If they were really demons, would they have told me?
If they were really aliens, would they have told me?
If they were really vampires, would they have told me?
If they were really monsters, would they have told me?
-
When they landed here, they did lotsa strange stuff
I saw it all myself, I saw it all myself
They vaporized rocks, they vaporized trees
They levitated rocks, they levitated trees
They transformed rocks, they transformed trees
They transformed you and they transformed me
-
When they landed here, they took a few samples
If felt it all myself, I felt it all myself
They took samples from me, they used knives
They took samples from me, they used needles
They took samples from me, they used tubes
They took samples from me, they used teeth
-
When they landed here, they said it was to help us
Who was I to doubt them? Who was I to doubt them?
Suppose they were conspirators, what could I do?
Suppose they were government, what could I do?
Suppose they were invaders, what could I do?
If you could just remember, I know you'd agree too
-
When they landed here, when they landed here
When they landed here, when they landed here
When they landed here...
KISS ME, MANDARUGO (bongo) Santa Rosa, CA 29 Apr 2002
[chorus:]
Kiss me Mandarugo, make me sing
Kiss me Mandarugo, make me laugh
Kiss me Mandarugo, make me live
-
The Mandarugo flies in the night
The Mandarugo whispers to me (ME!)
The Mandarugo takes just a small bite [chorus]
-
The Mandarugo drenches me with beauty
The Mandarugo's breasts shine like stars
The Mandarugo sucks out my eyeballs [chorus]
-
The Mandarugo is more than a memory
The Mandarugo is more than a dream
The Mandarugo is more than a nightmare [chorus]
YETI, YETI [bluezy] Fairview, CA 12 April 2002
I don't know just what it means
Yeti running through my dreams
Yeti running through my dreams
-
Huddled 'round the campfire light
Sasquatch keeps me up all night
Sasquatch keeps me up all night
-
Is it my ego, is it my id?
Or some other hominid?
Or some other hominid?
-
Bigfoot, Bigfoot, is that you?
Am I just a Bigfoot too?
Am I just a Bigfoot too?
-
I don't know just what it means
Yeti running through my dreams
Yeti running through my dreams
VAMPIRELLA CAME TO ME [rocker] Santa Rosa, CA 27 July 2002
Vampirella came to me, put her hand on my knee
She said, "Boy, you're the one, gonna have so much fun"
-
Vampirella came to me, so supernaturally
Took me to another place, left no marks on my face
-
Vampirella came at sundown, shattering my emotions
Her love poured down like rain. ecstasy flashed like pain
-
Vampirella came to me, smelling like Wasabi
How could I use jealousy on someone such as she?
MY WIFE IS A WEREWOLF (present wife excluded) [folky] Santa Rosa, CA 27 July 2002
My wife is a werewolf / but that doesn't bother me much
'Cause we don't need to hire / a security service
To protect our apartment / or my comic-book collection
Yeah my wife is a werewolf / so what's that to you?
-
Yeah my wife is a werewolf / but that's kinda nice
'Cause she scares the cats away / so I don't hear them howling
And she's out all night prowling / so I get to sleep a lot
Yeah my wife is a werewolf / you got a problem with that?
-
So my wife is a werewolf / and sometimes there's a problem
When she gets really horny / then the lovemaking gets thorny
She want to do it doggy-style / for a long long while
Yeah my wife is a werewolf / and my knees are giving out
IN THE TREES [rhythmic] Volcano, CA 13 Nov 2002
Wind blows thru the fir trees
And snow's on the manzanita
The earthquake rumbles far away
Like traffic in the valley
-
There's monsters in the trees
But they don't bother me
'Cause my heart is pure and I'm sure
That I'm the meanest monster here
-
There's lighting in the sky
And ghouls in the forest
Grey volcanic ash is drifting down
Out of the northwest
-
My heart is lost in centuries
My heart is torn in cedar trees
A ghoul is ripping out my heart
But that don't bother me
But that don't bother me
[Werewolves In] THE RAIN [gentle] Novato, CA 15 Dec 2002
Listen to the rhythm of the rain
Beating on the rooftops here in town
Washing all our memories away
Pouring on the lonely old werewolves
On the soggy soggy old werewolves
-
Listen to the murder of the rain
Screaming as its life-blood drips away
Concealing all the criminals in town
Washing clean every bloody fang
Like Listerine on those bloody fangs
-
Witness the surrender of the rain
Helpless when the clouds give way to sun
Waiting to erode a suntanned bun
Watering another crop of werewolves
We really need another crop of werewolves
We really want another crop of werewolves
We gotta have another crop of werewolves
DOWN AT THE TOYS'R'US [techno-tango w/ steel drums] Sebastapol, CA 20 Dec 2002
I got an inflatable Chupacabra
Down at the Toys'R'Us, oh yeah
With LED lights for his eyes
It's a wonderful toy, oh yeah
-
I got a vampire Santa Claus
Down at the Toys'R'Us, oh yeah
With dripping fangs and a Ho-Ho-Bite-Me!
A wonderful toy, oh yeah
-
I got a satanic Barbie doll
Down at the Toys'R'Us, oh yeah
She's ready for your next Black Sabbath
A wonderful toy, oh yeah
-
I bought a fuzzy talking Werewolf
Down at the Toys'R'Us, oh yeah
Just squeeze his foot and he growls and hisses
A wonderful toy, oh yeah
-
[instrumental]
-
I bought the electric Kiss-Me mummy
Down at the Toys'R'Us, oh yeah
All wrapped in shrouds of PolarFleece
It's a wonderful toy, oh yeah
-
I bought the robotic President
Down at the Toys'R'Us, oh yeah
Ana-tomi-cal-ly cor-rect
It's a wonderful toy, oh yeah
-
I bought the Garfield vampire cat
Down at the Toys'R'Us, oh yeah
With long black wings and a high black collar
A wonderful toy, oh yeah
-
[instrumental]
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