Title: Top 20 Engineering Phrases: Translated
 
   TOP 20 ENGINEERING PHRASES: INTERPRETED 
      
      
 1.  A NUMBER OF DIFFERENT APPROACHES ARE BEING TRIED.  - We are still pissing 
 in the wind.
      
 2.EXTENSIVE  REPORT IS BEING PREPARED ON A FRESH APPROACH TO THE PROBLEM.  - 
 We just hired 3 kids fresh out of college.
      
 3.  CLOSE PROJECT COORDINATION.  - We know who to blame.
      
 4.  MAJOR TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH.  - It works OK, but looks very hi-tech.
      
 5.  CUSTOMER SATISFACTION IS DELIVERED/ASSURED.  - We are so far behind 
 schedule the customer is happy to get it delivered.
      
 6.  PRELIMINARY OPERATIONAL TESTS WERE INCONCLUSIVE.  - The damn thing blew 
 up
 when we threw the switch.
      
 7.  THE RESULTS WERE EXTREMELY GRATIFYING.  - We are surprised that the 
 stupid
 thing works at all.
      
 8.  THE ENTIRE CONCEPT WILL HAVE TO BE ABANDONED.  - The only person who 
 understood the thing quit.
      
 9.  IT IS IN THE PROCESS.  - It is so wrapped up in red tape that the 
 situation is hopeless.
      
 10.  WE WILL LOOK INTO IT.  - Forget it!  We have enough problems for now.
      
 11.  PLEASE NOTE AND INITIAL.  - Let's spread the responsibility for the 
 screw
 up.
      
 12.  GIVE US THE BENEFIT OF YOUR THINKING.  - We'll listen to what you have 
 to
 say as long as it doesn't interfere with what we've already done.
      
 13.  GIVE US YOUR INTERPRETATION.  - I can't wait to hear this bull!
      
 14.  SEE ME or LET'S DISCUSS.  - I really don't give a rip but I'll pretend 
 to
 listen!
      
 15.  ALL NEW.  - Parts not interchangeable with the previous design.
      
 16.  RUGGED.  - Too damn heavy to lift.
      
 17.  LIGHTWEIGHT.  - Lighter than RUGGED.
      
 18.  YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT.  - One finally worked.
      
 19.  ENERGY SAVING.  - Achieved when the power switch is off.
      
 20.  LOW MAINTENANCE.  - Impossible to fix if broken.
 
 From: Mark

Wil Stark, wstark04 (at) pobox _dot_com

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